Monster under the bed
The nurse shone her torch around the darkened hospital room. It flashed briefly on the patient who squinted under the light.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Solo," she said, "I didn't mean to wake you, but I thought I heard a noise coming from your room." As she moved the light away, she noticed that her patient seemed to be flushed and sweating. "Are you all right there? You look a bit uncomfortable." As if he could be anything else she thought, what with that heavy cast on his leg and the bandage on his head.
"I'm quite all right," replied Napoleon. "It was just...I think I must have been dreaming, and cried out in my sleep...and that was the noise that you heard."
His voice sounded innocent enough...almost too innocent, and the nurse eyed him suspiciously. "That could have been it...it did sound like a voice." She could have sworn she heard a rustling noise but then Napoleon coughed loudly. "What was that?"
"Nothing," said Napoleon quickly. "Unless..."
"Unless it was the monster hiding under my bed...you'd better be careful nurse, I've heard that they're very fond of young pretty things like you. They just reach out with their long claw like hands...and grab hold of your ankle, and then they drag you under the bed and chew you into little bits with their long shiny teeth..." His voice was serious but there was a twinkle in his eye as he smiled at her.
"Go back to sleep, Mr. Solo, there's no monsters here." The nurse smiled at him and shut the door.
Napoleon waited until the door was closed. The rustling under his bed grew louder. "Okay, I know you're under there...you'd better come out if you know what's good for you..."
A very dishevelled Illya looking as if he had pulled his clothes on while underneath a hospital bed crawled out into the open. "I thought hospitals were supposed to be clean," he grumbled as he brushed dust out of his hair. "It's filthy under there."
"You're just lucky she didn't catch you, otherwise we'd have seen a real monster!"
"With claw like hands?" grinned Illya as he climbed back on top of the bed and straddled Napoleon. "And long shiny teeth?" He dropped a kiss onto Napoleon's lips.
"Hmmm...you know, if you keep climbing up the drainpipe after hours to have your wicked way with me, I'm never going to get any rest, and what are the nurses going to say."
"Tell them the monster under the bed kept you awake," grinned Illya, sliding his hand down Napoleon's chest.
"Hmm, maybe they'll offer to share my bed and keep the monsters away...ouch!" Napoleon yelped as Illya tweaked his nipple.
"I am the only one who will keep the monsters away from you, my friend."
Napoleon kissed him gently on the lips. "And you're the only one I need."